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*NEW* Facebook Page!
So, there are bad people in the world that have nothing better to do than to mess with a small fan page. I’ve had to create a new one and start over. If you are interested, please go to the link below or follow the link to the right on the side bar of this page. Thank you!
“Like” & “Share”.
www.facebook.com/MarieAngela.MilitaryWife
Boston
No matter what the headlines read, there is still so much good in this world and it outweighs the bad. I’ve raised my children to look at the reaction, not just the action. Sadly, there will always be evil, but the good of humanity shined today when people ran towards the explosion instead of away, when runners ran to hospitals to give blood, and when we all opened our hearts and offered prayers and help. My closing line for my children today will be, “There were more good people than bad people in Boston today.” – Marie Hobson, Milspouse Writer
Lessons learned from a seasoned wife
2013 came out of nowhere. I’m pretty sure it was planned and possibly on people’s calendars, but I was delightfully unaware and living in denial. To say this last year flew by would be an understatement. I know people say things like, “I can’t honestly believe time has gone by so quickly,” but this statement rings so true to me. Where did the time go? How did I get to this point of having a 10 and 14-year-old? How are we already reporting back to sea?
I know this is partly our fault. The Husband and I chose this path. I agreed to the back to back sea tours before this shore rotation. Now I see why shore duty is so important. I get it. R&R is not a luxury. It’s a necessity. Would I go back and change things? Yes. We spent 7 1/2 years on sea duty. The last couple of years he was gone 10 out of 12 months, only to live apart (geo-bacheloring) for an additional year after it all. Yes, I would change it in a heartbeat. All of this is said with hindsight. In the moment I was supporting my husband. I brought up these concerns, but they were quickly dismissed because we could do anything together. We were best friends and honest with what we needed from each other. Now, I know love isn’t enough. 14 years later and I love my husband more now than our first kiss, more than our wedding day, more than the birth of our children, but love isn’t enough. You can’t build a marriage on intermittent restricted emails and middle of the night calls from ports. It doesn’t matter how much you love them. You may be able to stay married, but no, you can’t build a marriage alone. Continue reading
Happy 2013. Here is your New Year reminder.
*Taken from the SITE DISCLAIMERS page of this blog.
Disclaimers
I am not a therapist, social worker or doctor of any kind. I am a wife of an Active Duty Service Member, Mother, Writer, Designer, Friend, and this is a Blog, not WebMD. Any advice given is done so from “one spouse to another” and while done so with best intentions and years of experience, it is just my opinion andjust my advice. Please seek professional help when needed.
Legally, Morally and Just because I can…..
I can and will refuse to add or approve mean or hurtful comments to this Blog, affiliated websites, Facebook & Twitter. “Friends” added to all these sites are at my discretion and will be deleted, unfriended or banished if trouble from said person arises.
TheyCallMeDependent.com is NOT affiliated with the United States Navy, The Department of Defense or The Federal Government, nor are the opinions stated on this blog a representation of any organization. Continue reading
I still hear the bells
Wishing you peace and happiness today. After watching The Polar Express as a family tonight, I only hope that you still allow yourselves to hear “the bells.” Merry Christmas from my heart to yours.
A Submariner Christmas Poem
A Submarine Christmas Poem
T’was the night before Christmas, he lived in a crowd,
In a 40 man berthing, with shipmates so loud.
I had come down the Sail with presents to give,
And to see just who in this rack did live.
I looked all about, a strange sight did I see,
No tinsel, no presents, not even a tree.
No stockings were hung, just poopy-suit close at hand,
On the bulkhead hung pictures of far distant land.
He had medals and badges and awards of all kinds,
But one in particular seem to catch my eye.
Why they were Dolphins, with a tiny submarine … pinned on with pride,
A sobering thought came into my mind.
For this place was different, it was so dark and dreary,
I had found the house of a Submarine Sailor once I could see clearly.
The Sailor lay sleeping, silent and alone,
Curled up in his rack, dreaming of home.
The face was so gentle, the berthing in such good order,
Not how I pictured a United States Submarine Sailor.
Was this the hero whom I saw on TV?
Defending his country so we all could be free.
I realized the families that I’ve seen this night,
Owed their lives to these Submarine Sailors who were willing to fight.
Soon ’round the world, the children would play,
And grownups would celebrate a new Christmas Day.
They all enjoyed freedom each month of the year,
Because of the Sailor, like the one lying here.
I couldn’t help but wonder how many lay alone,
On a cold Christmas Eve on a sea, far from home.
The very thought brought a tear to my eye,
I dropped to my knees and started to cry.
The Sailor awakened and I heard a rough voice,
“Santa, don’t cry, for this life is my choice.”
Defend the seas this day,
So others may rejoice.
The Sailor rolled over and drifted to sleep,
I couldn’t control it, I continued to weep.
I kept watch for hours so silent, so still,
And we both shivered from the night’s cold chill.
I didn’t want to leave on that cold, dark night,
This Guardian of Honor, so willing to fight.
Then the Sailor rolled over and with a voice soft and pure,
Whispered, “Carry on Santa, it’s Christmas Day,
All is Secure!!”
Author: Unknown
The Sailor’s Christmas
“The Sailor’s Christmas”
Twas the night before Christmas, the ship was out steaming,
Sailors stood watch while others were dreaming.
They lived in a crowd with racks tight and small,
In a 80-man berthing, cramped one and all.
I had come down the stack with presents to give,
And to see inside just who might perhaps live.
I looked all about, a strange sight did I see,
No tinsel, no presents, not even a tree.
No stockings were hung, shined boots close at hand,
On the bulkhead hung pictures of a far distant land.
They had medals and badges and awards of all kind,
And a sober thought came into my mind.
For this place was different, so dark and so dreary,
I had found the house of a Sailor, once I saw clearly.
A Sailor lay sleeping, silent and alone,
Curled up in a rack and dreaming of home.
The face was so gentle, the room squared away,
This was the United States Sailor today.
This was the hero I saw on TV,
Defending our country so we could be free.
I realized the families that I would visit this night,
Owed their lives to these Sailors lay willing to fight.
Soon round the world, the children would play,
And grownups would celebrate on Christmas Day.
They all enjoyed freedom each day of the year,
Because of the Sailor, like the one lying here.
I couldn’t help wonder how many lay alone,
On a cold Christmas Eve on a sea, far from home.
The very thought brought a tear to my eye,
I dropped to my knees and started to cry.
The Sailor awakened and I heard a calm voice,
“Santa, don’t cry, this life is my choice.”
“Defending the seas all days of the year,
So others may live and be free with no fear.”
I thought for a moment, what a difficult road,
To live a life guided by honor and code.
After all it’s Christmas Eve and the ship’s underway!
But freedom isn’t free and it’s sailors who pay.
The Sailor says to our country “be free and sleep tight,
No harm will come, not on my watch and not on this night.
The Sailor rolled over and drifted to sleep,
I couldn’t control it, I continued to weep.
I kept watch for hours, so silent, so still,
I watched as the Sailor shivered from the night’s cold chill.
I didn’t want to leave on that cold dark night,
This guardian of honor so willing to fight.
The Sailor rolled over and with a voice strong and sure,
Commanded, “Carry on Santa, It’s Christmas, and All is Secure!”
Author:Unknown
Losing innocence
My 10-year-old daughter, Makayla came rushing down the stairs and quickly opened our front door to the cold night air. “What are you doing, Kay?” I asked. “I’m setting a moth free.” I watched as she carefully and delicately opened her hand and told the little moth, “It’s ok, you are safe, you are free now. . .go find your family.” The moth fluttered away. Kay smiled, closed the door, and ran back up the stairs where she was reading. I started crying.
I’ve tried not to let my thoughts go there. I haven’t been watching the news. I can’t. The thoughts are enough to bring any mother to her knees. I sat down with both of my children and talked to them about what happened in CT this week. I knew they were going to hear about it whether I wanted them to our not. They took the news with heavy hearts. We talked about the Christmas present that would be left unopened, how unimportant a fight was with a sibling earlier that day, and the thought of never being able to see one another again. They hugged each other a little harder today.
The next part of our conversation was about the shooter. We talked about his age and what he did. My son (14) was quick to say in the defense of the shooter, “There must have been something wrong with him.” I explained that we don’t know if there was or wasn’t. My daughter (10) chimes in, “People said he was evil.” My mind whirls with how monstrous this act was. How could anyone do this!? But, my heart that felt like a ten pound weight in my chest wouldn’t let the words come out. I explained that we did not walk in his shoes and we are not going to refer to him as, “evil.” His actions were horrific; unimaginably horrific. But, we cannot hate him. Nothing good stems from the feeling of hatred. He is a human being, just like the lives he took and we don’t have the position to judge him. My children understood, but both looked at me with large eyes and asked, how/why did this happen. I softly explained that they will hear many reasons in time, but we may never really know. Sometimes terrible things happen and we don’t get to know why. They hugged me and went upstairs to play together. A few minutes later, I hear laughter and I cried again. There are houses tonight that will not hear that sound. There are siblings gone, forever.
It is our job to do better. It is our responsibility as parents to educate ourselves, our children, and be present in their lives and in this world. There is nothing I can say to make anyone feel better about today and the children (and adults) that were taken from our world. Nothing.
Filling the void of deployments by becoming the Osmonds of Soccer
Dad/Coach warming up his Son/Goalie
Yesterday my husband calls very chipper from his office and says, “Hey! Do you want to play on an indoor soccer team with me and Zach (our 14-year-old Goalie)”? A few things quickly went through my mind. 1) I don’t play soccer. 2) I don’t know how to play soccer. 3) He must be asking because they are desperate to find women for the team. 4) Zach loves to play with his Dad, but his MOM!?!?
Within seconds and without much hesitation I replied, “Sure, why not!?” My husband in shock says, “Really?? You’ll play??” (He’s been trying to talk me into this for a year or two) Me, “Yep. If you’ll teach me.” He yells back to another guy at the office, “She said YES!” And he then lets me go. Continue reading
