33 Responses

  1. Feel free to use this page to post a comment about my Blog, suggest a topic that you would like written about, or anything else on your mind! Just type it in the comment box below! : )

  2. Thank God for facebook or I would never have known that you have this blog, I love it! Thanks so much for doing this. :)

  6. I too, found your blog through a post of facebook and re-posted for others to read your article “Military Spouses are Anything But Dependent.” I really enjoyed reading a few articles and can [totally] relate to the relationship stuff and I am absorbing your stories about raising children in military life. (We are expecting our first in Sept. ) The article about you says you are in WA, looks like it is where we are too? It’s cool to be able to further connect to your blog :) I look forward to reading more posts and finding some favorites to share with my friends and family. Happy Tuesday! :)

  7. Hi Leha! Thanks for the comment. Yes, we are in WA. We just PCS’d here in December. I have a Column that was running on the East Coast, which I want to continue writing, but I’d love for it to run somewhere here as well. I need to get caught up from the move (which is going on 5 months now, so no more excuses ;) ) Thanks again for taking the time to write. It’s nice meeting you!

  8. Your columns have been a staple in my reading life for a few years now! I remember the first time I read an article in The Periscope. I could relate to your words on such a deep level, knowing what this life entails! I looked forward every Thursday thereafter curious as to what life experiences you could shine light on for that week in the paper. Ive reposted articles on Facebook, and have had Military friends as far as Washington State reading them and thanking me for posting them! Please keep your words lively, because there are many of us out there that need to know we are not alone <3 Thanks so much Marie….*muah*

  9. Angie, If you are still in the Kings Bay area, you won’t have to wait long. :) I have a lot going on and I’m getting a few Columns set aside so that there won’t be any “gaps” in my weekly Column. There should be a Column in the paper next week or there after. Thank you so much for the wonderful comment. I read comments like yours when I am having a rough moment with my writing to remind me why I do it. I love my Column and really feel that it is my “therapy”. Thanks again and I am so happy you found me on the big wide web! :)

  10. Marie, I am so glad I found your blog! Your “Military Spouses are Anything but Dependent” article is making the rounds on Facebook, and I loved it! My husband is active duty Air Force, and we just PCS’d to southern California. (This Georgia girl is a long way from home!) Though sometimes it’s hard and lonely, I wouldn’t trade it for anything. Because of him, I’ve seen some amazing places and met some amazing people who I otherwise would never have known.
    Anyway, thank you for your wonderful perspective, and I look forward to reading more!

  11. Okay, I think the “They call me dependent” article was great. I’m sure you’re a very strong woman. But I must say I think it is rather selfish to bring children into a home without a father present. I have a few friends whose dads were in the military and from what I’ve been told, it sucks. Yes, you did know what you’re getting in for when you got married (although that doesn’t mean it’s not understandable to miss your husband like crazy). I know your husband is in the navy, but I’m sick and tired of hearing about this “protecting your right to speech” bullsh*t. We send our men and women to Iraq and Afghanistan to “help” the people by visciously murdering thousands of innocent civilians. I do appreciate those who join the military to serve their country. But people in the military are not all automatically heroes. Those who shoot children who may or may not be strapped to a bomb do not deserve any kind of award. They come back so f*cked up in the head, my cousin being one of them. Fighting in battle changes a person, giving explanation for why domestic abuse rises after a man comes home from war, withdrawling from the family, extreme PTSD, alcoholism, pill-dependence, suicide… It’s sick how the US has lost 4,000 young people, and how countless civilians in the middle east have been murdered. Just my opinion. I am interested in hearing yours, or that of any other military wife. Peace.

  12. Liz~ I see that you have had a emotional experience with the military. I am not here to discuss the war, politics, or anything close to it. There is good and bad with war and serving. And this may be shocking, but as military spouses, we have opinions too. We don’t just keep our mouths shut and support the Red-White & Blue. I have my own thoughts about every war we have been in and how we interact with other countries, but this is not the place to discuss it. My Blog is a personal blog that I didn’t send out to one person I didn’t know. This is a place for distracting and support. All I ask is that those who post refrain from profanity and show kindness and respect. No one said service men and women are automatically heros. No one said bad things aren’t happening. I see that you have thoughts to share , so I encourage you to start your own blog to discuss them.

    Now, on to your comment about bringing children into a home without a father. My husband is present. When he is deployed, he is present through me. Period. He is involved in every shape and form imaginable. Our children, along with other military children are incredibly well rounded, grounded, and amazing young people. Does it stink to have Dad gone for periods of time? Sure. Does it affect them? Of course in some way it does. BUT, my father wasn’t military and he was gone working two jobs to support our family. Your comment could easily offend any civilian family who doesn’t have a high paying job and works too much. My father worked out of state when needed to support us. Does that make me a damaged child? No. I had a wonderful childhood despite my father being gone for many months at a time. It’s what you make of it. It is up to the parents to make sure their children grow up with love, support, and a sense of worth. A parents job or work hours will not change that. Parent are responsible for raising their children, you can’t point fingers at a career. Thank you for your comment, if you choose to post again, please refrain from the language.

  13. I am a brand new USMC wife. Next week I will be celebrating my 1st anniversary, alone. My husband is on 7 month deployment rotations so the first few months of our marriage were spent mostly apart while he was in the field doing his pre-deployment work ups and then was followed by a few brilliantly wonderful days (or even weeks if I got lucky!) of spending time with the man of my dreams. I must say when this deployment time frame closed in on us and he actually left I had a pretty grime outlook on how my next seven months would be spent. I am now just past the half way mark and I have had my ups and downs, things breaking, eternal freak-outs, exhausted lonely nights, and all of the above. I found your blog through a Facebook page that all of the wives from our husbands unit share and I whole heartedly credit you with my being able to accept the good, the bad, and the ugly with my head held high. Your blog helped me to see that I am strong enough to handle this deloyment and the future ones to come. Thank you so much for your words and sharing your experiences. It really does help to know that I am not going crazy and infact some of the things that I am feeling and are happening are normal. This blog taught me how to laugh at the odd situations I find myself in and how to look at the bigger brighter picture. I cannot thank you enough and I also cannot wait until he comes home so I can show him some of the hilarious stories that you have written. I know he will enjoy this blog as much as I have and will continue too.
    Thank you again,
    Amanda

  14. Amanda, first congratulations on your new marriage and welcome to the club. ;) This is the biggest sorority in the world. I am so happy that you have found comfort and support in my writing. Everything you just said is exactly why I write. As a new wife in your shoes, I was tired of all the talk from the military telling me how I was going to feel, what I should do, and all the lingo I didn’t know. All I needed was someone to tell me it was going to be ok. I needed to hear that what I was feeling was normal, but no one told the stories about what actually happens. So, I started sharing my own experiences. I like to lovingly refer to it as, “The Good, The Bad, and The Deployment”. :) I am honest in my writing to a fault. I absolutely love what I do. Between writing and speaking engagements, I don’t think I could choose what is more fun. I see the *light bulbs* go on and faces light up when wives look at each other and say, “That is so me!” while laughing out loud. My husband will start deploying again next year. I’m sure you will see a change in my writing at that point. I write a lot more and there are lows and highs. Thank you so much Amanda for sharing these kind words with me and I hope that you will continue reading. I love knowing that you are there on the other side of my words. Thank You. ((HUGS)) and again, welcome to the coolest club I know. ;-)

  15. Thank you Marie, for taking on Liz’s comments. We spouses hear this stuff a lot!

    To Liz:
    I especially love the part about us know what we were getting into. No, you don’t. You may think you do but I can tell you from growing up a Navy brat, the Navy is great at surprises! Like Marie said in another comment, there is no handbook, no video. There are just the words and experiences of other spouses and take it from me, no two experiences are the same.

    Furthermore, military wives and husbands raise their children alone at times so that they can protect our country. Notice I said OUR. Do I agree with where we are and what we are doing at all times? No. But I support my military families no matter what. That being said, there are plenty of fatherless and motherless homes in this country that have nothing to do with the military. Yes, we “knew the life” but our children are raised with as much love, care and strength as any other family. Our children typically are more respectful, behaved and emotionally strong because of this experience. That comes from good parenting, not having two parents. I can also tell you that from experience.

    Though you may not support the engagements of the military, I encourage you to support the families of those who serve.

  16. I found your blog today after reading the “Navy explores longer submarine deployments” article that the AP published. I think my wife would have said the exact same thing if she were asked about extending deployments greater than 6 months. My first deployment was extended at the last minute by 1 month, which was no fun for everyone involved.

    I’m going to recommend your blog to my wife; she’s 6 months pregnant with our first child so I think she’ll find your blog useful and insightful!

  17. Thanks Brian,
    I just posted my actual response if you or the wife would like to read it and best wishes to you and the wife on the newest addition!

    W/r
    Marie

  18. Marie, you came to me like an angel, I say that I’m rather new on your blog and it’s been a blessing. I think you might have saved my marriage :) I have so much to say yet don’t know where to start or maybe is just because I’m at work. I just want to say thank you for your words, your wisdom and knowledge and for taking time to help some of us that are in the middle of our own “war” lol!

    ARMY wife

  19. Army Wife,

    Thank you so much for this wonderful comment. Sometimes, it is hard to be transparent, but every time I get a comment or email like yours, I’m quickly reminded why I need to be. All I want to do is share my thoughts, feelings and experiences in hope that others will feel that they can relate and are not alone….especially when we are going through our own personal wars. *Hugs* ~ Marie

  20. When I read this, my eyes filled with tears because it is 100% true.I am 20 and I have a two year old son, and this is our first deployment. It is very hard at times but I have to stay strong for my son. Thank you for writing this blog it has opened my eyes to see that it’ll be okay. before I know it this deployment will be over and My husband and son and I will be a family once again.

  21. Just found your blog and love!!! (Although I have to say, had I received a trollish comment like the one from Liz above on my own blog I would have simply deleted it and banned her. If that makes me a bad spouse–or bad blogger–so be it) Anyway, thanks for doing what you do. Looking forward to reading more.

  23. Mommainprogress,

    Thank you! I think it is up to the author and whatever you feel comfortable with. I don’t think it makes you “bad”! I personally want to make sure everyone is heard (without hurting anyone).You’d be surprised by the emails I get apologizing. I hope that by letting people post, they will also take the time to READ and maybe a few things can be learned on each side. :)

  24. Hi Marie,
    My friend Jessie and I were discussing fun ideas for deployment halfway boxes, and she mentioned that you had a blog a while back about that specific thing! Is there any chance you could repost it? Or guide me in the right direction so I can see some other ideas??
    Love reading your blog, you’re hilarious!
    ~Dacia

  25. Hi Marie!! I Googled “Halfway Box Ideas” and you site was the first thing that came up! I clicked on the link, to my surprise it’s you! :-) Great blog and congrats on all your awards!! Keep up the good work!!

  27. Hi!
    My husband has been in the Navy for four years and we are very close to being done with our contract and getting out to go back home to Texas.
    I’m curious as to how couples deal with becoming civilians again, and how they deal with being with their spouse again all the time “without annoying eachother too much”, as my husband says, lol. We only had a month between two long deployments so being together constantly will be very different, a welcome change, but a big one none the less.
    Thank you for any advice you might have!
    -Tori

  28. Just want to thank you for serving our country too, because it’s clear to me that our troops have spouses, parents, brothers, sisters, grandparents, and sometimes little kids of their own who all serve during their loved ones’ absences. My family wants you to know that we pray for everyone who serves our country, every night we sit down to our dinner table. Please know how very grateful for everything you go through while your loved ones serve our country. If not for our military, we wouldn’t know all the freedom we so cherish today. We thank you from the bottom of our hearts and think of you all more often than you know. People who don’t even know you are praying for you and your loved ones to serve safely and return to you when the deployment is over. Sending Internet hugs and gratitude for all of you who miss your loved ones and for all your loved ones who serve our beloved country. Stay strong and support one another.
    Candice R

  29. My husband is in the USAF, and while we don’t have humans. But it is always fun and inspiring to learn of other spouses making the most of the fact that, sadly, sometimes our partners have to leave for months at a time–and we have to move to different locations throughout the world. I am an artist, so, of course my experiences are different from yours–but strong spouses like you help to remind me our world has its positives as well as its negatives.

  30. I received the klink to your blog from my stepdaughter who is married to a Marine whose is often gone for days. Also, I am a retired military (20 years) and it hit home with my experiences while in the military. So much in your entry “Lessons learned from a seasoned wife” is right on. I have a blog (www.latenightmusings.com ) but it pales in comparison to your. I wish you well.

  31. Hi! I absolutely love your blog and can relate on so many levels. My hubby is active duty navy and we’ve been married about 7 years, blessed with two little ones and have moved four times (so far!). I work for an amazing company who has started a non-profit supporting the professional, career-minded military spouse – and I think you’d enjoy knowing and learning about the organization. Just wanted to share and thank you for my sanity checks knowing I’m not alone in this crazy military spouse life… we’re half way through deployment #4 and I need a lot of sanity checks.

  32. A friend posted about your blog on Facebook and I am SO glad she did! I LOVE it! I was reading our post about the young wife, and it totally hit home for me. I am 20 just turned twenty, got married at 19 and pregnant at 19. Our son was born a month ago, one month after my husband returned from our first and his first ever deployment. A long 8 month deployment, It was my first and I was devastated I cried for weeks, months actually. My pregnancy was the worst, I was so lonely and miserable. I worked with all spouses at the daycare, and none of them seemed to care very much that their husbands were gone. I was confused, and scared. I didn’t know what to do without my husband. And I didn’t have friends to help me through deployment. If I wasn’t able to talk to my husband nearly everyday I don’t know what I would have done. I am so thankful for the improved communications on Afghanistan. It was heartbreaking not having him here, and it seemed like no one understood why I was so upset. Now with him home my husband is gone a lot because of his job in the Army. He hasn’t been away since he came home and I am not ready for him to leave again in a few months even if it’s only for a month. I am terrified of being alone with my newborn son. Again, thank you!!!!

  33. Hi Marie! I found your blog thanks to someone posting on Facebook the your “I love my husband more than you love yours” entry. I am a new Marine wife, and your blog has just given me so much encouragement! I love, love, love your honesty. My sister was in the army, but of course being a spouse is so much different. So thank you, from a young, new milspouse :)

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